Snapshots From Our Weekend #1

This weekend was a fairly good one for me. I didn't spend it completely on my own as I usually do. Paddy had a long weekend off from work so we spent it together. A large portion of it was spent putting dreadlocks back into Paddy's hair. (this will be his fourth set since we met) It's a long and very frustrating process for me because I can never sit or stand in the same spot for very long, so get annoyed with having to sit and backcomb hair for hours on end. (I will be doing a post on how to do dreadlocks)

On Friday, I took a break from sorting out hair, to have lunch with my best friend and her son. We went to our usual pub and had our usual meals. Not very adventurous but it was good to get out of the house and I enjoy walking around town with her.

Saturday was a lazy day, spent finishing Paddy's hair and watching film after film.

Sunday was mothers day here in the U.K. so it was something of a difficult day for me. Not only do I not have my son with me but due to a family fall out, I no longer speak to my mother. Despite this I had a pretty good day with Paddy. We cooked Sunday roast, watched more films and took Rosie for a long walk.

I have to say lazy days like these are my favourite. I may not get a lot of work done but I always feel better after. Not having to do anything makes me feel less stressed when Monday rolls around and it's back to the usual routine.

Friday Catch Up #2

This week's been quite relaxed if I'm honest. I had big plans for it when it started but none have them have been even remotely fulfilled. The house in desperate need of sorting out. There's clutter everywhere and the spare room has been half decorated for at least a few months now. Since none of these things got sorted out this week, I'm rolling them over to next week.

Instead I spent the week doing nothing. I curled up in my corner of the sofa and scrolled through tumblr endlessly. I read book after book and ate pretty much everything in the house. I allow myself weeks like this. When everything catches up with me, and nothing seems important anymore, this is how I spend my time. When it passes it's usually followed by spurts of sorting and cleaning.

I did manage to get out of the house at least once this week, which I was happy about. I think it helped snap me out of the mood that little bit sooner.

During the time I spent doing nothing at all I've managed to plan the entire house and loads of upcoming blog posts. Now I just need to get around to actually doing them.

Sunny Day Road Trips 9/03/2014

Quite often when the weather is nice (not a usual occurrence during this time of year) Paddy and I go for a drive. Not usually to anywhere specific. We usually just drive to somewhere for no reason and then return and stop off for lunch somewhere. This time we went to Newtown.

Friday Catch Up #1

This week has been somewhat eventful. For me at least. After spending so much of my time inside my house doing nothing, I've had a fair amount to do.

On Saturday, I celebrated my best friends son's first birthday. It was great seeing his face light up when faced with brand new toys and food to try. Sometimes it's difficult being faced with him as it's such a harsh reminder of where Ted should be, but I can't help but be happy every time I see that cheeky grin.

Both Monday and Wednesday saw my friend in and out of the hospital for checks. Not wanting to leave her on her own through all that, naturally, I accompanied her and stayed with her for the rest of those days. This girl has been there for me through so much and I'm thankful for her everyday.

The other days have been peaceful. I've caught up on a lot of reading, knitting projects and even started drawing properly again. It's been such a long time since I've been able to just vent, creatively and I must say it is the best form of therapy you could ask for.

Eating Disorder Issues

I've briefly touched on this subject a few times, but felt that I should delve a little deeper into it as I'm currently trying to pull myself back from a major slip.

I've had issues with food for as long as I can remember. In fact I don't think I've eaten properly since i was old enough to feed myself. I picked up some odd eating habits from watching my mother. There were many things wrong with it all, that i'm not going to go into. I don't really wish to discuss the details of my struggle when I was younger, but I will tell you that over the past year I've fallen pretty bad into some old habits.

Obviously things over the past year haven't been great, but I noticed it before it got too bad. I'm hoping that if I can pull myself back from it now, that I can avoid any further issues.

I've always been thin. I'm never going to be big or curvy. That's not my body shape. However, I have been at lower weights than I should, many times before and I don't want to return to that state. After noticing my weight drop, and realising I've been skipping more meals than I should, I headed to the nurse for a check up. Everything seems to be in working order at the moment, so this is my chance to turn it around. As everyone, I have good days, and bad days. On good days, I realise my eating is ridiculous, and I am able to eat properly with no guilt and actually want to turn things around. On bad days, I know my eating is ridiculous but I just can't convince myself that gaining weight or eating normally is a good thing. On very bad days, I don't want to even consider getting better. Sometimes I like the broken.

Right now, I'm doing okay. I've eaten really well over the past few days, which may not seem like a lot to some but it is to me. And i'm taking up running to help build muscle tone because right now i look like I've got skeleton legs.