Some people may think it slightly counterproductive to celebrate the birth of a child that's no longer with us. But I don't agree.
I don't want this day to be a day that everyone regrets coming around, or avoids.
So this year we celebrated it - as I hope we will do every year - with our friends and family.
We went to our local pub. It was the pub that both my partner and I have worked at, celebrated Edwards birth in and that held the wake.
The people there are really good friends and the atmosphere is amazing.
I was surprised by the number of people that turned up. Although a lot of them were weary about it - understandably - they turned up nonetheless.
The night went well - as well as it can go anyway - and despite the circumstances not being what they should have been I had everyone I needed there.
My best friend made a small speech at the minute Edward was born which did set everyone off. I was fine up until that moment but once I cried everyone else started. Despite that, it was beautiful.
It's been a very long and difficult year. Recovering from a birth without your child is hard to say the least. There have been bad days, and there have been worse days - I don't want to say 'good and bad days' because it isn't a good thing that he isn't here.
I've missed a lot this year because I've simply been vacant for most of it. A lot has happened that I've been completely unaware of but I'm now at the point where I'm ready to re-join the world somewhat.
I want to thank everyone that has been sending me e-mails and messages on my Tumblr asking how things are going and wishing me well. It really does mean a lot.
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